Under the Top Knot

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Top knot, yoga pants, no make-up.

This is the unequivocal stay-at-home / work-from-home mom uniform. Instead of “Dress-down Friday” there is Wildcard Weekday where at least once a week you rock the pajamas you slept in the night before. No judging.

Before we moved to Hudson I would be in client offices 1-2 days a week and also squeeze in work at home. I set my hours and we had a nanny come to the house to watch the kids. As ideal as this situation was, it was still hard to walk out the door on mornings when the kids were crying for me.

Despite the tough mornings, I loved the work I was doing and valued the time where I still got to live the “business” side of myself.

Creative brainstorming sessions, client pitches, campaign development and execution. I loved the challenge of it all and I loved to see ideas take shape and make an impact.

When we moved to Hudson my work dynamic shifted to 100% remote.

Sounds awesome, right?

While it has it perks, I went through an adjustment period transitioning to being at home full-time. Other than eight weeks after Laine was born, I had never been home with both kids around-the-clock.

Creative brainstorming sessions suddenly became compiling lists of ways I could entertain both kids for 12 hours on inclement weather days (living in Ohio keeps this eternally relevant). Client pitches are now elaborate schemes to get the kids to eat one good meal a day.

Caring for my kids all day isn’t new to me—I was doing everything I am now before we moved. But before, when I had a buffer of being able to step into the business role one or two days a week, it all seemed more manageable.

There is a sense of perpetuity with staying at home with kids full-time that can be downright overwhelming.

There is no definitive start and end–at least in the infant and toddler stage we’ve been living the last three years.

From where I’m standing–in my leggings with unintentional and non-fashionable holes–these new parent years are filled with huge and invaluable moments with your kids that make your heart want to burst with love—but at the same time this period can also feel like endless days of singing nursery songs, microwaving chicken nuggets, and wearing yesterday’s clothes.

When you are at home full-time It is so easy to get buried in the caring for the tiny humans and feel like you’ve lost sight of the person you once were.

One pretty sure-fire remedy? Haircut and style.

I got a haircut this weekend and it was amazing.

You get to sit in a chair and not get up for an entire hour. 60 minutes without having to get something for someone. That in-and-of-itself is worth double the going-rate for a haircut.

More importantly, I got a glimpse of myself with my hair done, make-up on, and sporting real clothes. I got to feel like the person I once was.

When I got home the kids were thrilled to see me and it wasn’t even hour later that I had my hair tied back and they were climbing all over me again. Their joy to have me home with them is something special. And I know the window where this is possible is small.

It will be back to yoga pants and chicken nuggets this week, but this weekend I got the reminder that under the top knot I’m still the same person I once was. And an even better reminder that I wouldn’t trade anything to be the person I now get to be everyday—Mom.


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